#Sacrifice

XOXO Honey Bii

Love Does Not Equal Hate

Marinate on this one. How easy is it to criticize and tell what you don't like about a person?

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Daring Greatly

People how often are we afraid to be vulnerable? Try it. Keep in mind being vulnerable does not guarantee the outcome you always hope for. What you will get every time is a sense of greatness! Live on purpose.

XOXO Honey Bii

Soft Stud Confusion

Hi,

I'm currently in a lesbian relationship with a women that I adore for over a year and this is my first relationship ever and im 25 y/o. Ive always dated men but never got too serious so when I finally got into this serious relationship sometimes I question if im really gay.  We live together after meeting at school and were roommates and thats were are relationship grew. At first it was just me being very curious and feeling like there had to be more out there sexually that I wasn't receiving from a man so I tried it . Then I felt the emotional bond growing between us and I felt like I couldnt go one day without this girl but now all we do is argue and she doesn't trust me. I've never cheated on her. Everytime I want to go somewhere by myself its a problem, she likes to be up under me all the time. I'm a femme and she a soft stud by I find myself playing the more masculine role ,she even calls me daddy (not just in a sexual manner) but frequently and I find it weird sometimes. She makes me feel like a dude and I'm much so a femme.  Should we switch roles or should I accept my soft stud who dresses in male clothing but loves getting strapped. Another thing is I don't really like penetration. She had told me her friend think I'm straight. I'm so confused.

HI!

Thank you for taking the time to write. I appreciate you. 

Whether you are in a straight or lesbian relationship, it is never good to not feel trusted. It may sound cliche, but if you do not have trust then it is very difficult to have a healthy relationship. You are young, there is no reason not to be happy. 

I want to point out just because someone dresses a certain way (femme or masculine whatever that means to you) that does not determine their sexuality. I think that you are stereotyping her. She should be allowed to dress less form fitting (not masculine because she is not a man and probably doesn't want to be one) and be allowed to experience sex any way that she and her partner feels comfortable. It is not weird at all. Heck, some think that two women sleeping together in anyway is weird no matter what. It seems like you just might want a woman who is more aggressive than she is sexually. It would be a mistake to make her feel uncomfortable because she chooses to be this way. If you do not feeling like a "dude" then tell her. It is simple. 

Also, you can be lesbian and not like penetration. I understand it and know many couples who prefer not to penetrate each other. There is such a broad spectrum in this life. Don't get so consumed with labels and stereotypes. Every relationship is different. Embrace them.

 

XOXO Honey Bii

Shit Lesbians Say (Studs)

This is what happens when I am up at 3am :)

XOXO Honey Bii

Freaks

This is the situation, I'm a straight female however, for a little over 3 years i have been curious about being with other women and i have always been into girl on girl porn and whenever i watch girl on girl porn i tend to get really excited if you know what i mean. in a way that i dont get when just watching a girl and a guy go at it. also i would have actual dreams of which i would be with a woman doing sexual things. also i like to watch a woman's ass when she walks but a lot of time i try not to do cuz i feel like other people notice im watching .

So anyway fast forward i meet this female who is about 7 years older than me from offline who is bisexual and married.
we quickly befriended each other. long story short she was my first girl on girl experience. i lied to her at first about being with women before, i had told her that i had been with at least 3 women before which wasn't true. Anyway this female ended up spending the night at my house and we slept in the same bed and i dont know what it was but something inside of me told me to take the plunge and to just touch her as my curiousity was like a pang in my side.
so anyway i took the initiative and started to touch her but then she flipped it on me and took control. i couldnt believe what i was getting into. That night i couldnt believe myself and i found myself at war with my soul. everything felt so good and my body felt like literally i could melt right there on that bed. but after all was said an done i felt huge guilt and dirtyness after doing what i did almost as if i was disgusted with myself. thinking to myself like how could i allow a another woman to do what she did and that god must really hate me now.
fast forward again we did it again on 5 other different occasions with each time being better than the last. 
i noticed after awhile i started to actually have feelings for her on a deeper level however i dared not to let her know that. i would feel butterflys and basically the same feelings i use to get with men are the same feelings i had for her which scared me but also had me confused.
now my things with men is that i havent been with a guy since 09 which is my daughter's father and yes i do get a lot of men trying to talk to me but i just dont be interested and what mainly turn me off from talking to any guys rights now is that usually that 9 times outta ten no matter how classy i carry myself they seem to have no respect and just only out to use u for sex and just the idea alone just makes me not even think about them like that i just focus on work and school.

back to the situation with this female , its like now ithat i've experienced being with her on those occasions it's like all the time i feel like my body crave a woman's touch like 24/7 its on my mind. and its like i seriously enjoy touching her squeezing her,tasting her. but now i think i am giving her the impression that i want to be more than friends with her ( which would be nice) and now i feel like she is trying to play me. like if u watch my video where im talking about liars im really talking about her in da video.

even when we outside i just feel like a dog in heat and be so ready to just hump her ass or whatever but because we outside i try to contain myself. she gave me my first multiple orgasm back to back i didnt even know what my body was going through when it first happened and NevER in my life have i ever experienced that with a man.

but the problem that i have is that ,i always feel like this and i still find myself trying to hang on to this female even though she likes to lie a lot but i try to hang on because of fear that i may not experience this ever again because nobody knows anything about this but me and her. it just right now at this time my mind is scared that i may be gay and its like i would prefer to have be intimate with a woman than a man anyday.
i never felt anything so passionate and sensual and being with her just feels like my body was being neglected until i met her. i dont know of any better way to explain it.
like what do i do and how do i accept these feelings that i have and how do i meet other females like me without making things look obvious to others?

if ur still there reading then i really do thank u for taking the time and energy to read my really long email

i really do appreciate it.

XOXO Honey Bii 

Happy New Year 2012

Let's make 2012 even better!

XOXO Honey Bii

I Am Cheating With A Woman

Hello.  Just would like to say that I really enjoy reading your blogs.  There was one that caught my eye which was 'I'm married but in love with a woman'...or something to that affect.  It caught my eye because I'm in a similar situation. Sort of. I'm a 36 year old black woman who has been married to a man. We've been together for almost 20yrs . We have kids together. I never imagined being with a woman. Never even thought about it. Until I saw her. She was at a party of a mutual friend and we sorta just clicked. No numbers was exchanged, only friend request through FB...anyway, we got to know one another. We talked and talked. She's what I would call an aggressive femme. To make a long story short, I've been seeing her for almost a year. She knows I'm married and she's single. She never asked me to leave my husband. She said that's something she would never do. I know that I love her. And it's a different type of love of what I have for my husband. Very different. I know what I'm doing is sooo wrong on so many levels but I don't want her out of my life and she feels the same about me. I don't know if I'm telling you my story for advice purposes or just to vent. I just like your blogs. Have a good one. 

XOXO Honey Bii 

Bisexual

Dear Honey Bii,

I am a woman that is attracted to women, but I don't know how to meet them.   I identify as bi-sexual because I still do find men attractive. I've tried being on downelink but because I identify as bi-sexual the lesbian community seems to look down on that.  I am the type person that only dates one person at a time regardless.  (I've never actually been with a woman intimately).  Not only that, I don't sleep around period.  It has been almost a year since I've been intimate and that is because I'm not in a relationship nor have I gotten close enough with anyone that I would consider it serious enough to sleep with.  Why does the lesbian community think that a bisexual woman can't be faithful?  How do I go about meeting a woman without hitting the club scene?  Should I just say that I am a lesbian to avoid the drama?  Please help...Thanks

XOXO Honey Bii 

Kids Need A Voice

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Spirit Day 2011

Join @FindingNaj and I tonight @9pm EST for our 1st live broadcast. http://www.ustream.tv/user/GayLifeDecoded

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XOXO Honey Bii

It's Complicat ed

Hello to you & this in advance for hearing me out in regards to this situation.

I started dating a woman 2 years ago and we got along very well. Soon she started to withdraw from me in different aspects of my life. I didn't know why until I asked her out of pure anger. She informed me that she couldn't be with me b/c I had no job (i.e i was fresh out of college) and that I couldn't provide for her like her previous gf. Her friends would tell her that I am not good b/c I am not the typical stud that pretend to be a male figure in the relationship. But as soon as she informed me of her not being happy of not having a job, I got one and started the process of getting my life together. So after that we can go our separate ways as far as relationship but can still have the friendship. I am very mellow person and I tried to be her friend, but every time we would interact with one another it would lead to something sexual or us fighting. So then I decided to cut it off completely and just handle my business and become a better me. However, we run in a similar circle. I do speak to her, but whenever shes in a drunken state she always seems to want to talk or wanna kiss me. I recently, found out that her and ex gf from before are an item. This ex gf left her in pieces and got married to another girl for a year. I want to know what is logic behind her actions??

Situation number 2 ties into the the first part. So I am gay social networking site and this lady introduces herself to me and we get to talking. Something in the back of mind tells me, "Why does the woman wanna talk to me out of the blue without me putting forth the effort". I gave her the benefit of the doubt and we started talkin and we do have great deal in common and she makes me laugh a lot. The only catch is that she is the woman that was married to my ex girlfriend exs wife. Do you think she knew that I was in a relationship with her ex wife's current gf? Do you think I should continue to commuicate with this woman??

Signed, Complicated.

Thank you so much for reaching out. 

I don't think that this needs a long letter. DON'T DO IT. It seems to me that you are a reasonable/sound person. I do not understand how under any circumstance that you would think this is ok. Of course this new woman knows exactly who you are. It sounds like both of you are hurt and looking to each other for support. Please do better. There are a million people on this earth for a reason. So that we do not have to recycle each other. 

P.S. Don't worry about why your ex girl friend has decided to go back to her ex. You need to move on. Let them be together in whatever capacity that they choose and better yourself. 

XOXO Honey Bii

Orgasm Part 2

My journey to my orgasms.

XOXO Honey Bii

National Coming Out Day

Today is a beautiful day!

XOXO Honey Bii

Dilemma

Hey there,

I'm a big fan of your channel. I love your positivity and inspiration to just be who you are but I have a huge dilemma that I hope you or your partner could help me out with. I'm a lesbian with a 6yr old kid and I haven't had an issue with anyone that I dated that was insecure with me being cordial with my sons father who happens to be my ex husband we been divorce since 2008 but I separated from him in 2006. Anyways my girlfriend of 1year and some months hates the fact that I answer the phone when he calls for my son she rather me just give my son the phone without saying hello or anything. We have broken up many of time over this same issue and this last break up was the worst.she completely move out of our apartment and a lot of our family was involved it was a big mess. She said that she is willing to work on our relationship only if I agree to not answer the phone when he calls just to give the phone to my son. I told her that I am even willing to get my son a phone of his own. I have before and I don't mind doing it again at this point I'm confused cause everyone I talk to that have kids or been in the same situation tells me that it's not worth fighting for just to walk away but I love her so much and don't see myself with no one else. She is truly my soul mate.I'm finally over my sons father and everything that he did to me while we was married and the aftermath but she doesn't think that I am.. I seen the video with your partner and she mention that she had a 10 year daughter. So I was wondering has she ever had to deal with someone she was with not be secure with her being cordial or answering the phone when child's father called and if so did she leave or work it out.

XOXO Honey Bii 

Accept Unexpected by L. Cherelle

Check her out Accept The Unexpected by L. Cherelle

XOXO Honey Bii 

Sunday Funday

Enjoy Family

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1 Year Recap

What an amazing year for me!!!!!!!!!

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Love Is Love

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Positive Energy

XOXO Honey Bii