22 And Confused

Letter from a Bii-Liever. 


I just turned 22 n I'm still living with my mom. I've been sheltered my entire life and I feel like its time for me to move forward in life instead of staying stuck like I am,plus my mom hates that I like women. Most of my friends are gay, but I don't hang with them because of her. I mean I could but when I come back home I still gotta hear her mouth and I hate it ugh! I'm also conflicted with the fact that I love women and I'm also a Christian. Please help me. I just don't know what to do it's so confusing and hard. I have not been in a relationship since 2008. My first love broke my heart and now it's like anybody else for dumb stupid reason, I compare them to her. Ugh. It's crazy because my mom liked my girlfriend until I told her she was my gf. Please if you can help me to figure out what I should do?

Peace and Love


I want to first state that being open with your sexuality can be quite challenging. I commend the effort that you have taken to be yourself.

When it comes to parents, it is a difficult situation to deal with. Parents for the most part want the best for their children. With that being said, it is your life to live. I would start off by living on your own. It is easier for someone to have control over your life when they are providing for you. We have all heard the saying, "If you in my house, you go by my rules."

The next step that I would take is to have an open discussion with your mom. Let her know that you are serious and need not only to be heard, but to be listened to. If you are uncomfortable with pulling her aside then write a letter. I would state to her that this is the last time that you are going to explain your sexuality to her. Either she is going to support you or not. No "ifs", "ands", or "buts". If she wants to have an open loving relatinship with you then she needs to recognize this part of your life as well.

You can view a video blog that I did on Christianity on my page. That is an entire discussion on its own. I included it for you.

In conclusion, remember that you are only 22. You have years to figure out relationship issues. Take it one day at a time. There is somebody out there for everyone. Make sure that whoever you are with is open with their sexuality, loving, and makes you feel positive when you are with them.


XOXO Honey Bii 

Dark Skin Girls

This was inspired from the color complex issues that we still have in the black community.  Here is the video link http://vimeo.com/24155797.  As Directed by Bill Duke and D. Channsin Berry: these are clips from the upcoming documentary exploring the deep-seated biases and attitudes about skin color---particularly dark skinned women, outside of and within the Black American culture.

XOXO Honey Bii

Drag Queen Tuck

Ever wonder how the queens tuck??? Check it out.

XOXO Honey Bii 

Coupons

Do you want to save money? Listen to this quick video on how to properly use coupons.

XOXO Honey Bii

Gay Christians

Is being Gay a sin? Can you be a Christian and be Gay? Here are my thoughts.

XOXO Honey Bii

Communication

This is some candid advice that I have on communication in a relationship. Thanks for viewing. 


Communication is the activity of conveying meaningful information. Communication requires a sender, a message, and an intended recipient, although the receiver need not be present or aware of the sender's intent to communicate at the time of communication; thus communication can occur across vast distances in time and space. Communication requires that the communicating parties share an area of communicative commonality. The communication process is complete once the receiver has understood the sender. -Wikipedia

XOXO Honey Bii 

Friends With Benefits

Hi Honey,

I am in my mid 20s and I got out a relationship with a women about 6months ago and I've recently began dating again. I was approached by a women that found me attractive, and I was also very attracted to her as well. As this women approaches me she states that she is "new to this" and further explains that she has never been with a women before, but has often had thoughts about being with women. I began to talk to her on a some what regular basis first just answering her questions then we grew to get to know each other on a more personal level. It has been about a month and we both noticed we formed a connection and often thought about one another. At this point my feelings have gotten involved and I have pretty much developed a crush on this women, but I am hesitant to continue talking to her afraid that she might just be curious sexually. I have heard many stories and advice from others not to pursue women that are curious because you will get hurt and it is just an experiment. So my question to you is what should I do? Should I pursue this women or should I just ignore my feelings before they get to deep and just have a friendship?

Thanks Honey Bii

XOXO Honey Bii

Farewell to Oprah: Smile

Oprah taught me how to smile...

XOXO Honey Bii

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Cancer Awareness

I rock a bald head in support of Cancer Awareness. 

I Wear A Pink Ribbon By Kimberly Harris 

A silent killer with no face.

A thief within the night.

A constant battle for my life

A bitter evil fight.

The scars remind me of the day

It knocked at my souls door.

It tried to rob me of my strength

It left me on the floor.

To survive, I had to sacrifice

My Breast and even my hair

It showed no pity as it snatched

These things without a care.

I started to give up my fight

I felt I could take no more

Then God reached down and

Gently picked me up off the floor.

He wiped my face and blew my nose

Just like my mama use to do.

He said don’t cry my child

For I have things in store for you.

I did not bring you all this way

to leave you high and dry.

I love you and you are my child

So hold your head up high.

There is nothing that I cannot fix,

No pain I can’t erase.

Have faith and know that I am here

There is nothing you can’t face!

So then I threw my hands up high

And gave God all his praise!

For my soul has been uplifted

And my SPIRIT has been raised!

I’ll fight this fight with cancer

And I know I will be fine.

For God said it and I know its true,

That VICTORY is mine!!

XOXO Honey Bii 

Elder's Advice

Here are 5 Universal Truth's that I know are true. Advice handed down from my elders.

XOXO Honey Bii

Zumba

Here is a great Zumba video that I would like to share. This is great for beginners. I enjoy Zumba because it is an active way to keep it shape. It makes working out fun.



XOXO Honey Bii

I Found Text Messages From Her Ex Lover

Hey Honey!

So me and my sweetie have been together for almost a year and it has been wonderful. I see true longevity here. I'm at the point of the relationship that trust and honesty need to be guaranteed if we're really going to do this for the long run. So what did I do, go through her phone. Yeah, I'm disappointed in my actions but its the guaranteed way to find out the real deal with your mate. Judge me later.

In her texts I found out that she has still been communicating with a "friend" of hers that she used to date. About a month ago we had an argument over this situation because I don't necessarily think its fair that she can be friends with someone she used to sleep with but would have a fit if I did the same thing. Now in all fairness I do know that they are just friends now, but I think its a respect thing too.  I choose not to hang with any of my ex's or old Boos because I think it would be disrespectful. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but any time two people are intimate with one another, I think its rather difficult (not impossible) to go to a platonic relationship.

Any way back to the subject: So I found out that they're still talking but she told me she was going to stop communicating with her.  (Although I didn't say she had to. this was her decision). Now I'm pissed because she lied to me. But I cant say anything because I was snooping in her phone. What to do HoneyBii. Help!

XOXO Honey Bii 

Hypocrite

I am a Lesbian woman. I came out to my children about years ago. They flipped out. It took awhile for them to deal with the fact that their mother is gay. I couldn't understand why they had a problem accepting me because a lot of our family is gay. ( fast forward) I came the other day and my daughter wanted me to meet one of her friends. So I walked into her room and I seen an "obvious lesbian" sitting in the chair. I almost hit the floor. I was confused, my daughter was the number one person protesting about me being gay. I just stood there and stared at this girl. When her company left I ask her what was the deal with the girl. She told me the girl liked her, I said to her but your not gay? right?. She said that her and the girl have been in a relationship for about a month. ( shocked again) I had a long talk with her and talked about the discrimination she will experience and etc, etc..

To be honest I don't like it at all, I'm confused and a little angry over her choice to be gay, but I know I Know you are saying I'm gay. I just don't understand why I have a problem with it. Please some advice with this. Also, I told her don't tell her siblings about this...

XOXO Honey Bii 

Carol's Daughter Sold Us Out

Here are my thoughts on the new 2011 Carol's Daughter campaign.

XOXO Honey Bii 

Dr. Maya Angelou

Dr. Angelou Recites "And Still I Rise"

XOXO Honey Bii